Shirley Valentine

Devoted British housewife Shirley Bradshaw spends hours talking to her kitchen wall and wondering what ever happened to the awesome girl she used to be. "Didn't you used to be Shirley Valentine?" an old classmate says to her on the street. Where did that girl go? Shirley will conclude that she's let her life be wasted and sucked away. Shirley Valentine "got lost in all this unused life."

Sounds a bit heavy, but this is one of the most delightful movies I've ever seen. A must see for sassy women everywhere.

There are two things that make this film such a delight. The first is the brilliant writing by Willy Russell. How a man captured so perfectly the struggles of a woman, I cannot imagine. But he did. And with a delightful wit and humor that make you think Shirley is just coming up with this stuff off the top of her head. Russell was nominated for a Tony for the original play--and rightly so.

The second is Pauline Collins (Shirley) who carries the movie from beginning to end with charm, intensity, vulnerability and sparkle. She received an Oscar nomination for this role, which was a recreation of her Tony Award winning performance on Broadway. The only big difference in the Broadway version was that it was a one woman show. Collins sat on the stage with minimal scenery and shared Shirley's story. It was amazing. I saw it from the third row. At one point, Collins/Shirley looked right at me and winked. I don't remember what lines went with that wink. I was pretty sure she did that to some girl every night, but I was sold anyhow.

The big difference for me, watching "Shirley Valentine" again this week, was that I am no longer the girl I was in 1989. Stories move us differently based on where we are in life at that time. When middle-aged housewife Shirley winked at an unencumbered 21 year-old me sitting in that Broadway theater, I thought it was all lovely, but I didn't really get it. Sitting on the sofa in my living room over 20 years later, her life-crisis hits a bit closer to home (and makes me laugh even harder).

Before we start down that unalterable path, I'm not sure anyone really understands what it means to become "wife" and to become "mother". What a woman gives up...and what she gains. I think we mostly stumble into it out of instinct or expectation. Can we go back to being the girl we were before it started? Can we keep from losing our girl-ness in the first place?

Watching this film again, it made me think back to a few weeks ago when I was working on digitally scanning our early family photos (from before a digital camera existed). This is the kind of inane thing good wives/mothers do. Beginning with photos early in my marriage, I worked my way through having babies and watching them grow. But I noticed something about those photos along the way. Besides getting a good laugh about hairstyles and watching my waistline grow, I had to ask myself: "Who killed my sparkle?"

Maybe putting a "who" on that question is not fair. Maybe it should be more a "what" killed it. Was it just life?

While I never had a soul-killing mean-spirited teacher like Shirley does, I have had some bosses who were doozies. More than one has said to my face: "Nobody here likes you, you know." Yeah. Thanks for sharing. Watch that sparkle dim a bit more.

Raising children, working, and being a "good wife" have their delightful moments, but probably do more to dim that sparkle than they do to light it. The battle goes on daily.

But what this film addresses, and what we all, male and female, need to consider in life is how to get that sparkle back. What has happened before is never the point. Where we go from here is everything.

Shirley takes a Greek holiday with a flaky girlfriend to try to figure things out for herself. In the same way that "Under the Tuscan Sun" made me dream of a villa somewhere in those green hills, Shirley's trip to the beautiful blue oceans of Greece made me want to book a ticket tomorrow. But we don't really have to go anywhere. Self-discovery is not one of those moments where it's all about location, location, location. Here. Now. That will do. What needs to change is our attitude and thoughts about ourselves and our lives.

Refuse to let anything put your light out. SHINE! Whether a woman goes down the family path or whether she runs the world in a corporate life, there will always be someone or something that wants to throw a big wet blanket over her joy and sparkle. We can lie down and play dead under that blanket, or we can toss it off. The choice is always ours.

And as I pondered where I personally go from here, a poem by Shel Silverstein came to mind:
Listen to the MUSTNTS child,
Listen to the DONTS
Listen to the SHOULDNTS
The IMPOSSIBLES, the WONTS
Listen to the NEVER HAVES,
Then listen close to me--
Anything can happen child,
ANYTHING can be.

Well alright then! Throw off those wet blankets of MUSTNTS and IMPOSSIBLES and the deadly NEVER HAVES and let's get on with it! What can I sparkle about today?

I ran across some current video footage of Pauline Collins in "Merlin" today. She'd be at least 70 by now, but I could still see that middle-aged woman in there somewhere. There's still a twinkle and a flash in her eye hinting at a force to be reckoned with yet. I bet she learned some of that from playing Shirley all that time. I hope I can learn from her example.

To find your own inspiration, grab a cup of hot chocolate (rudely ignoring any whisper about "that'll go straight to your thighs") and curl up with "Shirley Valentine". It will give you some wonderful chocolate for your soul.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098319/
Properly rated R--adult content throughout.

Chenoweth is "A Little Bit Wicked"

Blogging about books is a rare event for me, but this autobiography is so darlin' and such a fun chocolate chip cookie for your soul that I figured it could use a quick shout out.

First, I would preface my comments with the fact that if you don't think Kristin Chenoweth is adorable and a talented force to be reckoned with, don't bother with this book. It's an autobiography, so it's all about her and her life and the shows and the challenges and the mistakes and all that. In order to enjoy the book, having some preconceived notion that she worth reading about is helpful.

Second, you should probably have a big love of live theater. I was raised on Broadway shows on tour, going to see "A Chorus Line" when I was 9 (which I don't recommend), and never missing anything that came through Champaign-Urbana or that was put on by the University of Illinois (where my older sister was in the drama department). That love has continued into adulthood, including meeting amazing stars like Tommy Tune and Juliet Prowse as that same sister continued a life in the theater and did national touring companies. My brother-in-law ran the prop department at our local pit-stop for everything Broadway, so we were treated to back stage tours often.

Despite all that, I often had no idea who Miss Chenoweth was talking about. There are piles of names dropped in every chapter. Names I'm sure are talented and important people on the Broadway scene. If you care, you might want to read this with the internet close by so you can do some research. I would just smile and nod and move on. I'll take her word for how wonderful they are...or not.

What was so delightful about this book is that you really feel like you've just sat down on the sofa next to her and she's chatting with you about her crazy life. Her sassy southern charm rings through in every story. And while she does spare some people their privacy, others, well...she does not. It brings the whole "careful, or you'll end up in my book" right home. And she's very open and honest about some big mistakes she's made along the way. Fessing up to "Wow, I wish I'd listened to everyone and never done THAT" is good to hear in a world that rarely says "sorry".

"Pushing Daisies" is now in my Blockbuster queue, and I sure wish I could get my hands on her ill-fated TV series "Kristin" (which she sarcastically refers to as a Wagnerian breast-plate huge hit). It makes me sad that I missed out on seeing her in "Promises, Promises", but I think we can be assured that her career is far from over. I'm still hoping for a chance to see her live some day. Knowing she's on Broadway again may get me back to New York.

After reading this book, I'm left feeling a personal attachment to Kristin Chenoweth. Like I've actually met her. I read a comment in "Entertainment Weekly" yesterday that was high complimentary to Aaron Sorkin (aka Mr. Writer), and I actually felt a surge of happiness for how excited I knew she would be to read that. It seems like that is the best way an author could make you feel after reading about her life.

If any of this sounds interesting to you, grab a copy of "A Little Bit Wicked: Life, Love, and Faith in Stages". If not, there's a billion other books out there just waiting for your attention. I'm on "Water for Elephants" now. Read the book before seeing the movie whenever possible.

And, Kristin, if you read this, tell your Mr. Writer that I LOVED "Studio 60" and everything else he's ever written. He should do a book next.

The Adjustment Bureau

I must preface this gushfest with the admission that I've been dying to see this film since the first preview months ago. They so Had Me At Hello. During a regular year, I only actually go to the movie theater to see about four movies. Wait a couple of months, and it will come on cable where I can watch it alone in the comfort of my own home. But I had no intention of waiting for this one.

Now that I've fessed up to my pre-biased status as ready to like this film, I am happy to admit that I was not let down in the least. The story was exactly as it was promoted (which is often not the case) and took me on the journey of a love story and what we are willing to do for true love.

As you have probably seen in the previews, the story follows David Norris (Matt Damon), promising political candidate, and Elise Sellas (Emily Blunt), a modern ballet dancer, who meet "accidentally" on a pivotal night in Norris' career. She serves her purpose, and that is supposed to be the end of it. But the Adjustment guys are not so perfect, and David and Elise meet again and cement the immediate chemistry they first felt (and which I believed to the tip of my toes).

What follows is attempts to separate them, based on the reasoning that they are not supposed to be together. It is not the plan for either of them and will actually lead them both to miss out on their dreams. Is the attachment so great that he is willing to risk his own aspirations? But, what about hers?

It is interesting to ponder the concept about why things happen the way they do. Was spilling your coffee and being five minutes late truly an accident, or was it part of your life plan? Or an adjustment to your life plan? Do we have free will, or is there some greater universal force that has a master plan for each of us?

Personally it makes me smile a bit, remembering a weekend almost 23 years ago. I was supposed to be working that weekend, but my best girlfriend invited me to a get away with her and her boyfriend--mostly to help me recover from yet another very broken heart. Amazingly, a co-worker who strongly disliked me (I mean, really strongly) agreed to take my shifts. This led to a wonderful weekend away from my troubles,...in which I met this great guy. Engaged a few months later. Hmmmmm. So was it chance that everything fell into place, or is there a plan?

Maybe it is just comforting to think that there is a force of some sort that knows what's exactly best for each one of us, personally, and is guiding our path. There has been many a movie focusing on this theme. I'm not sure I have any solid answers for any of that. This film, however, draws some interesting conclusions. I don't do spoilers, so you'll have to find out for yourself. I must say, I was highly satisfied with the ending--except I wanted to know what happened from there. That's a good place to be at the end of a film.

While I give this movie my highest recommendation for lovers of romance, there were some very burly guys outside the theater who were unimpressed. I heard something to the effect of "suck-fest" and one wishing he could have that 90 minutes back. Poor guy. I've felt that way before. Maybe he should have seen "Hall Pass".

For the rest of you, especially the women who believe in soul-mates and the power of love, head to this movie first.

And that guy I met all those years ago, he thought the film was excellent.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1385826/

PS This film is based on a short story by Philip K Dick, who is also credited with things like "Blade Runner", and "Total Recall" (okay, cheesy movie, but good story), "Minority Report", and "A Scanner Darkly". If you enjoyed any of those, you'll be thrilled here.

Regarding Henry

This 1991 film is one of the great ones that I will drop everything to watch when I run across it on TV--even when there are commercials involved. Harrison Ford gives the performance of his life and Annette Bening proves that she's worth so many Oscar nominations. Add on JJ Abrams as writer and Mike Nichols directing, and it all comes together in one of those cinema packages that's about as close to perfect as it can get.

What is most beautiful about this story is the observations about what makes us who we are. Ford's character, Henry, begins the film as, frankly, a real SOB. A lawyer who you'd never want to meet unless he was fighting for you. Arrogant, cocky, workaholic, and not great father, he still seems to have the perfect and wonderful high-society life that many people dream of--successful career where he is at the top of his game, a huge apartment, beautiful wife, smart daughter.

But who is he really? In the first moments of the film, Henry is shot when he walks in on a convenience store robbery in progress. The injuries are so serious that he basically has a stroke and loses everything from his memories to his ability to talk and walk. He is starting from scratch.

"You have to be very carefully taught," the song says, and Henry seems to be proof of that. Stripped of the "work ethic" that was pounded into him by his father, and freed from all the other garbage he has learned along the way, Henry is a totally different person.

The best word I can find for this new Henry is "guileless". Once he has regained the ability to live a normal life, he has to figure out what "normal" is going to be. It's rather like, at five years old, meeting your adult self and realizing that he's a big old jerk.

And it also becomes crystal clear that many things about his glorious old life were simply illusion and delusion--lots of smoke and mirrors. It was all just moments from crashing down. People who claimed to be dear friends, not so much so. And none of it really worth trying to regain.

Henry realizes that he doesn't want to go back to being that person. But where do you go from that realization? If we are pondering our lives at all, we have all had those moments of needing clarity. Who am I? Why am I where I am, doing what I do? Where do I want it all to end up?

The fantastic advice Henry receives from his physical therapist, Bradley (wonderfully played by Bill Nunn), is good advice even for those of us who have not had to fight back against such astounding odds.

"Don't listen to nobody trying to tell you who you are," Bradly tells him. "You'll figure yourself out."

Putting a life together from the barest of structure would be overwhelming. Reinventing yourself, no less daunting. But when there are true friends and people around determined to support and love every incarnation of you, it becomes a bit easier.

"Regarding Henry" fills up something deep inside my soul that wants to believe that deep down we are all good and loving. That everyone has the potential to change and be redeemed. This film makes me feel so warm and fuzzy, I don't even need chocolate. And that's the biggest compliment I could ever give.



 For more info, check out:  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102768/maindetails

PS Watch for cameo moments from JJ Abrams as the grocery delivery boy and John Leguizamo as the thief who shoots Henry at the very beginning (and says he got hate mail from Ford fans for shotting him).

Link of Value!

Check out this link for the upcoming feature film "The Last Lions". Every time you watch the preview, a donation is made to support lions in the wild. Share this wildly!

www.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DHZ7SvK7w1xA&h=f662d

About A Boy

I ran across this gem from 2002 on TV the other day and immediately recorded it, even though I've already seen it more than once. In my humble opinion, this is one of the best true acting performances of Hugh Grant's whole career. I'm not sure why it ended up qualifying as a "sleeper", not getting much attention. It was even nominated for an Academy Award for best screenplay adaptation. Quiet films that don't get 500 million commercials to promote them sometimes just fall between the cracks.

Based on the book by Nick Hornby, the plot follows the relationship that develops between Will (Grant), a totally self-absorbed and isolated young man who has never needed to work a day in his life, and Marcus (brilliantly played by Nicholas Hoult), an uber-goobery and totally socially inept tweenager. As Marcus deals with his mother's depression (played by the wonderful Toni Collette), he pulls Will into their lives, all but kicking and screaming. The odd relationship this forms helps both of them to grow up and learn how to interact with the world.

A tagline from the film says, "Growing up has nothing to do with age." It always leaves me wondering which male character the "Boy" part of the title is referring to. Maybe it's meant to mean both because Will, though older, is not much more than a boy emotionally. He has found peace and quiet in his solitary life, seeming more like a man of 80 than one who is 30ish, but he has not found joy. And the more Will's life is stirred up and he realizes that he is basically a pretty useless and uninteresting person, the more that joy eludes him.

I also love the clearly stated theme that "No man is an island" and "we all need backup". It's not enough to just move through the day. Relationships are what bring the richness and fullness to life...even if they are often what make us want to run from life screaming.

And, the lesson we can all use more of: Sing with your eyes closed. Give in to life. Find something you love and pour your heart and soul into it. Giving himself over to this is a turning point for Will in the film, but it makes me wonder how rarely I have those moments myself. Life needs lots of them.

Take the time to find this film. It's playing on cable this month. It's well worth it. Great chocolate for your soul.

PS   My big shock of the morning was to do a little "where are they now" on Nicholas Hoult, who was so wonderful as the little boy, Marcus. It was obvious there was definite potential for greatness in that young actor, who was a very short and pudgy 12ish at the time, but I recognized his adult face immediately! Besides being a part of the UK cast of "Skins" (which I have not seen), he was in "A Single Man" with Colin Firth and "Clash of the Titans". He's also in the new X-Men movie and the remake of Mad Max...and now stands at a slim 6'2". Doing well, to say the least!

Interview with Roger Nygard on "The Nature of Existence"

The following is my interview with the creator and director of the last film I commented on: "The Nature of Existence". It's a long interview, but well worth it. Enjoy!!

Dubbed an "Enlightened Grown-Up" by the students he taught as a guest speaker on philosophy at an International Baccalaureate school in Brazil, Roger Nygard admits to not feeling like a grown-up at all. "I still feel like the goofball I was as a kid, just in a body that has more aches and pains."

Before sitting down in the editing booth to work on Season 8 of "Curb Your Enthusiasm" (which he says pays for his documentary-making habit) Nygard spoke on the phone with me about his new film "The Nature of Existence" and how he became a documentary filmmaker.

Nygard admits that he hadn't intended on taking this path when he started out in the business. He credits his first dip into documentaries to Denise Crosby, a woman he had cast in his first film, "High Strung".  As a former Star Trek cast member, Crosby was often invited to the film conventions, and she pitched Nygard the idea of doing a documentary on the interesting people who attend. He was surprised that no one had already done it. It seemed so obvious. Nygard says it was like, "Look over there, there's this diamond in the middle of the road. How come nobody's picking it up?"

The end result was "Trekkies" and "Trekkies 2"--for which Nygard says he's probably most notorious.

"It's addicting," Nygard says. Instead of trying to reproduce a screenplay in the perfection that's already on paper, "documentaries are like a journey that you start but you don't know where's it's going to end. It's continuously exciting during the process."

He's also been accused of being a "closest anthropologist," because his films are about sub-cultures of humanity. Nygard has even received copies of anthropology students dissertation papers on "Trekkies". Other of his documentaries, "Six Days in Roswell" and "Suckers", follow that same trend.

His most recent project, "The Nature of Existence", explores the sub-culture of faith and belief systems that exist around the world. Nygard had found himself personally  questioning many of the largest esoteric questions in life, especially when faced with events like the passing of his father when he was 13 and the tragedy of 9/11 later in life. As he began asking others about these questions, he realized that there was an opportunity to share the answers in a documentary.

Establishing 86 questions that span the range of "why do we exist?" to "is there morality?" to "what is the devil?", Nygard spent four years traveling the globe conducting interviews. The final movie consists of a variety of answers from 170 people and over 450 hours of film.

Nygard often found that when someone agreed to an interview for the film, they didn't know quite what they were getting into. Two hours later, they'd be totally exhausted. These are emotional topics we often avoid or just don't think about on a daily basis. "It was fun to see someone reconnect with that feeling," he says, even the pastor of a church who hadn't really considered these questions since seminary.

This film is now being used in classrooms, which is something he had never anticipated. Thinking back on his brief teaching experience in Brazil, where he discussed these questions with philosophy students, Nygard reflects that he was surprised by the emotional connection he felt with the students when they would grasp a deep concept he was trying to get across. "You are making them a thinking being who is conscious and self-aware. Those are words that people take for granted."

"I know lots of people who are not self-aware and it's questionable about whether they are very conscious. They just go through their life on a very surface level and it's not until a personal tragedy happens, to them or someone close to them, that they're forced to consider these questions.

"I'm trying to bring these questions up before people are forced to think about it because not only should we think about them but it's actually exciting and fun to wonder and discuss and debate the after-life or soul or sin and free will. Do we really have free will? It's the kind of debates you have at two in the morning in your dorm room with your fellow college students."

When asked which was the strangest interview experience (and there are many to chose from), Nygard went immediately to the particle physicists and the mind-blowing concepts they are coming to believe about our universe.

"It can just freak you out!" Nygard says.  Trying to contemplate the infinite number of universes that exist, each with its own separate law of physics, he says, "If you didn't feel insignificant before, a little spec in the universe, now you're a little spec in a multi-verse!"

Nygard says he could have listened to the physicists forever to learn more about how they are looking for the origin of the particles that started the universe. "Basically, it's the search for the Creator or an origin that affects the universe and us."

Brother Jed is also certainly hard to ignore. A confrontational evangelist on an epic scale, Nygard says he couldn't put the most bizarre stuff Jed does in the movie.  The "Gay Song" is only the tip of the iceberg. "That may be the strangest moment," Nygard laughs. The odd (and to many, highly-offensive) song did not make the movie, but you can find it on youtube and at the movie's web site.

Nygard freely admits having a special favorite in the older people he interviewed. "The older the better," he jokes. "I think they were a little bit closer to truth because they don't care what people think any more. They'll tell you the way that it is." Children come closer to honesty too, he feels. "They're not as on-guard, which you learn to be as you grow older."

While the interviews could have gone on forever, Nygard says that he needed to find an end-point for this documentary. While it could never be totally done, he felt he needed to just pick a deadline and stick to it. In his mind it had reached the point: "Okay, I've just got to give birth. I've been pregnant long enough."

The Companion Series is now serving as the sequel of sorts. "The movie became the appetizer," Nygard says, "and people wanted the full buffet once we'd awakened the thirst for more information." Fans of specific interview subjects wanted to hear more from that particular person, or on one specific question. While not all 86 questions made it into the original film, they are all included in this series of DVDs.

"People only have energy for about 90 minutes worth of answers and then their brain needs a rest to process it," Nygard jokes. So the Companion Series is an avenue to share the many hours of wonderful film that could not be included in the movie.

In an interview with "Life to the Max" (show #99), Nygard talked about this film as a comedy. When asked why he took this approach to the material, he said that being social creatures as a part of a social community, he believes that we improve that community through laughter.

"Everything I do has that element of humor to it because any good artist gives you a point of view of the world or the universe as seen through their eyes. I see the world and the universe as absurd, but not in a bad way. When you see something that's absurd, it makes you laugh, and that's how we process tragedy and hardship and very serious subjects--through laughter--because if you don't laugh you will go crazy. It's a tool we use to deal with the immensity of what seems like the pointlessness of the universe and, in fact, gives us a point.

"If we can make someone else laugh, then we've fulfilled our purpose for that day. If you can reach out and touch somebody in some way, help them, give them some comfort or make them laugh, you're realizing your purpose on a daily basis."

I wondered if, after hearing all of these answers, Nygard himself felt any closer to his own, personal answers. "Well, yeah," he admits, "but the more answers you get the more questions that come, and so the answer is that you're never done."

Nygard feels that the one lesson he learned is that the journey continues and always will. "The work is never done," he says. "Your whole life, you're on a journey.

"If you do say, Okay, I'm all done, then you begin the process of dying. It makes no sense to me, the idea of retiring from life. Your entire life you should be continually challenged and challenging yourself to reach your potential. Even if your potential is declining from what it was when you were 18, you still have potential and you should still be striving to reach it. Plenty of 80 year-olds are still vibrant intellectually because they're still excited about knowledge and life and learning. You can learn, and should learn, your whole life. You're never done. You shouldn't be done."

Thinking about how visiting other cultures helped open up his own thought, Nygard comments that immersing yourself in another culture that is totally different from the one you have lived in can take some adjustment.

Remembering the Buddhists who meet every January to pray for world peace, Nygard says, "It's like a Star Trek convention for Buddhists. Everyone's got their uniforms on, you look around and you're surrounded by thousands of Buddhists in the same uniform, and they're all chanting and praying and chanting, circling and perambulating around this temple, but it's all strange in a good way."

"To better understand your own country, you have to leave it and come back after you've seen other places. It really opens your eyes to things you were oblivious to before."

So maybe, to appreciate your own belief system, you need to consider what others hold as truth.

"I sometimes, as joke before a screening, will say to people: I should warn you not to see this movie because it will mess with your mind." After a good laugh, he'll admit, "But if your mind is already messy, you'll be fine."

But for those who think they have all the answers already, there can be a problem. "If everything is stacked in nice neat piles, those piles might get jostled a little bit because that's what happens when you receive new information." And this new information can be seen as a threat.

"You may spend your life defending this idea you hold sacred against all the new information. That takes a lot of energy." But if you go with the flow of the universe, Nygard feels, you can have a much more peaceful and exciting life. "Chaos is exciting!"

"I hope the film just opens up people's minds a little bit to wanting to ask questions and learn more. That's the whole point."

Sharing a bit about his next project, Nygard said that he felt he needed to take his own advice and push himself to do something even bigger. "What's even more challenging than the nature of existence?" he laughs. "I set my sights kind of high!"

The one topic he found even more perplexing? The nature of marriage. The whole arena of relationships, divorce. "It's the marriage concept that I find, and many people find, mystifying. Even people who are married still seem mystified by it sometimes." Who knows how many hours of interviews will be involved in that film!

Nygard stresses that he loves to hear from people about what they are learning or being challenged by. You can reach him through the web site, or even take a moment to share your thoughts on one of the 86 questions. He does read the answers. And take a minute to tell your friends about this film.

"You make something," Nygard says, "and you put it out there, and you never know what will happen. Hopefully, people will keep discovering it."

"Please help spread the gospel, as it were!" Nygard jokes.

Okay, readers. Click on "like" or "share" and do your part!

More can be found at http://www.thenatureofexistence.com/.  

The Nature of Existence

Is there some grand, eloquent meaning and purpose to life? Or is it all just about sex and chocolate?

This new documentary certainly does not provide any unswerving answers...except for the realization that, no matter how strongly one person may believe in their own solutions to these questions, there is someone else out there who will just as confidently and definitely contradict him.

Director Roger Nygard spent many years traveling the US and "hot spots" around the world interviewing experts and, well, not experts, to see what they had to say about the most unanswerable challenges of human existence. Is there a God? What happens when you die? What is morality? Why does any of it matter?

From the little girl who lives next door to a conservative Jewish Rabi in Israel to a Druid priest and many physicists and "God experts", the answers are sometimes funny, sometimes provocative, and sometimes a little scary. And which ones you think fall into which categories will probably depend on what you already think the correct answers are. Especially on the whole "God" question level.

What I really loved about this DVD is that Nygard never tries to wrap things up in a nutshell. Hundreds of hours of interviews are simply edited together so that there is a back-and-forth and a flow to the conversation, tied together with his own quirky narration of how confusing it all is or where he's going to try for answers next.

As a woman in the middle of my own existential crisis, I thought the whole conversation was thrilling. Most of us grow up learning one set of ideals. Usually the ones held by our parents and the community we live in. Some of those teachings can be invasive and touch on every fiber of every decision we make. Others are pretty vague, as Carrie Bradshaw says, "I went to the church of be nice to others and chew with your mouth closed."

But to be able to stand aside from what we feel is "right" and "true"--especially the TRUE part--and ponder another perspective, is absolutely vital. A few good solid "what ifs" never hurt anyone. If you find everything you cherish totally upended, well, maybe you were not on such solid footing to begin with.

I'm not promising that this DVD will rock your world, but I hope it will make you think. No matter what side of things you stand on, you are going to hear from those who take exactly the opposite view. Listen to them. Take a minute to hear things from the other side. Open your thought. Open your heart. There's a big world out there and millions of people churn around in it. Taking 90 minutes to hear what some of them have to say about the biggest questions of life may just be some good, rich chocolate for your soul.

According to one of the men interviewed, chocolate is the purpose of life. Sounds like a good first step to me!!

For adult audiences due to honest and blunt discussions of sexual issues.

You can find out more at: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1196672/

The Yellow Handkerchief

Isolation. Separation. Loneliness. Lost love, or the fear that you'll never find it. Most people have filled those shoes to the fullest at one time or another. A remake of a 1977 Japanese version by the same title, this sweet film follows three strangers, each dealing with their own issues of not belonging to anything. Joining up on a ferry and suddenly caught in a rain storm together, bonds begin to form. Sensing the dark thoughts that they each have in common, the trio spend several days travelling through Louisiana together...and find themselves getting to the heart of their problems at the same time.

The largest messages of this film are acceptance and forgiveness. The three main characters are pretty odd and anti-social. Yet, each of them is seeking the same love and acceptance as all the rest of us. And not finding it. Loving someone, despite all of their flaws, is what real, true love is all about. Being able to forgive and continue to love when those flaws come flashing to the surface is the challenge.

Hurt's character, Brett, is so dear, and his story is so sad, but sweet. As the details are slowly revealed throughout the film, I found myself desperately hoping that he would find the redemption and forgiveness that he so clearly deserved. I could only gasp when the reason for his punishments (both legal and self-imposed) are revealed. I just wanted to wrap him up in a big blanket, make him some cocoa, and tell him it would be okay.

The world can be a cold, hard place, and forgiveness can be hard to come by. Genuine acceptance for exactly who we are, with no exceptions, almost impossible to find. The Yellow Handkerchief stands to me as a reminder that we have to be willing to give love before we are going to get it. Give acceptance, before we can truly feel it. Ask for love, to maybe find that we already had it.

Listed as a 2008 film, it saw limited release and didn't hit the US until 2010--in only a handful of theaters.  That's part of the purpose of this blog: to get attention for films like this that fall by the wayside.With wonderful performances by William Hurt, Mario Bello, and Eddie Redmayne (Pillars of the Earth), it seems crazy that I've never seen anything about this movie. Even Kristen Stewart (playing the same angsty girl she always does) does a solid job.

Independent films do have a slower pace than most Hollywood-fare, but that's not a bad thing. Devoting a couple of hours to watching individuals grow and overcome their fears is time well spent. It can teach us life-lessons. It is chocolate media for your soul!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0954990/  for more information
very mild PG-13

The Secret of Moonacre

We stumbled across this gem mainly because I was intrigued by the cast. Put Tim Curry, Ioan Gruffudd, and Juliet Stevenson together, and you have my attention. Add in a magical kingdom and a unicorn and a precocious little girl who saves everyone, and it's family movie night!

Plot and details, you can find at http://www.imdb.com/video/imdb/vi819725081/.

While my husband and older daughter had some fun being snarky (I believe there was some comment about Mr. Fantastic and Frankenfurter being at war), my 12 year-old LOVED it. Now, I'm sure she is influenced by the fact that she's pretty sure she is a fairy princess stuck on earth--and that she would love to be a Moon Princess herself--but she also delighted in the romance, courage, and willingness to defy authority that is demanding allegiance for the wrong reasons.

Maria Merryweather's job is ultimately to reunite two epically-feuding families, who have been at odds for centuries and have only a few days to get it together before a curse will destroy them. There are bitter lovers to soften and pride to be melted. The happily-ever-after ending left my daughter all a-squiggle.

The Lessons? There is no grudge too big or long-standing that is cannot be healed. Greed can make you blind, but it can be overcome. Pride can bring ruination to love, but it can be redeemed. And it can happen in a moment, even for the gruffest and hard-hearted.

From magical pearls and a dog/lion protector to a dottering/belching nanny and a chef from Wonkaland, this film is a delight. From my home to yours, I highly recommend it as magical chocolate for the soul.